School Spirit Skit 1

Now beat that

And your mother's saying "Go to college"

So you finish college, and it's wonderful

You feel so good

And after all the partying and craziness

And don't forget about that drug habit you picked up at school being around your peers

Hey, now you'll get that 25-thousand job a year

And you'll spend all your money on crack cocaine

But, it'll be your money

No more borrowing from mom for my high

So now you get your degree tattooed on your back

You're so excited about it

If you continue to work at the GAP, after several interviews, oh my God

You'll come in at a entry-level position

And when you do that

If you kiss enough ass, you'll move up to the next level

Which is being the secretary's secretary

And boy, is that great

You got to take messages for the secretary

Who never went to college

She's actually the boss's niece

So now you're part of the family

You know what college does for you?

It makes you really smart, man

All you kids wanted to talk in the back of the class

Not me, I listened, okay?

I was a hall monitor

This was meant to be

You know how many classes I took?

Extra classes, extra classes

No, I've never had sex

But you know what?

My degree keeps me satisfied

When a lady walks up to me and says

"Hey, you know what's sexy?"

I say, "no, I don't know what it is

But I bet I can add up all the change in your purse very fast"